Should be

My whole life I've heard and been told what should be. What's expected. What's right. Which fulfills the standard of one particular set of ideologies. My conclusion? Should be is like an inanimate object. It does not move on it's own: it is an agent (in this case, of hope). It must be acted upon by another force in order to arc in a dark foreboding rainbow of coping judgment. As soon as abstraction is involved, in the case of divinity for example, the should be is weakened without a strong launching foundation. The process just squared its faith requirements. So, reduced, it becomes "this should be because god said so, and god should be because..." What is the acting force on this new should be? How can the acting force even be identified without complete faith? If god Is not, then what should be?
And I believe god could be. But I don't see how it should. I also don't see how it shouldn't.
A yes man is going to hit some double negatives once in a while. A no man is going to be safe from a lot of happiness. I prefer maybe. Not is, isn't, should or shouldn't be's.
Not to say I'm a flip flopper...
Do not think me lost or fallen, for my stride has purpose, even when I have no destination. I hold my naked, label-shy perspective with pride, because I am searching for contentment, and finding it every step of the way.
My name is Azriel Atlas.
Something in your voice tells me that you would understand what I'm looking for. Maybe you're a fellow seeker. Maybe you have some of the answers.
Maybe.
Perhaps, as a break from form, I will get a chance to speak to you. I'm not sure where you broadcast from...